This is my improvement on my blog
before
Joseph26 June 2016 at 19:36
I think we should keep it because it is a lot of fun and
because you can learn a lot of stuff.
My comment is a bit too short. I also have used no greeting.
after
because you can learn a lot of stuff.
Hi Miss Whoa its Joseph here looking at the photo's from camp
thanks for taking us on the year 6 camp did you have fun ?
thanks for taking us on the year 6 camp did you have fun ?
My comment has capital letters. It is longer. I have also used a greeting and asked a question.
